Things That Go Boom

The party set out from Magnimar headed for Sandpoint and parts unknown. Well … not really a party at this point – just seven unacquainted and somewhat mutually suspicious individuals. Sawyer thought Bella looked like trouble. Roderick sulked and refused to talk to anyone else. Shinjiro kept a meditative silence. Only Zhustin was incurably cheery, pestering everyone with unsolicited questions about who they were, where they were going, and why.

Over dinner that night (spicy beans and biscuits – yum!), Roderick finally gave in and shared some of his story. He explained that his name was actually Nickolas Chelax (“you can call me Nicki”), a minor noble from Cheliax. He had been visiting Korvosa on family business when the real Lord Roderick paid him to take his place at a ball he didn’t want to attend himself. As he was slipping out of the ball to rendezvous with a young lady, someone hit him over the head, tied him up, and dumped him into a wagon load of horse crap. As they drove him away, he overheard them talking about a ransom, and realized they must have thought they’d kidnapped the real Roderick Genterre. From the wagon, he was taken aboard a ship for several days, then “persuaded” to join this caravan. Although they had some questions about his story (why had his kidnappers let him join the caravan? why was he in a caravan headed away from home and not one headed back to Cheliax?) most of the party were totally fascinated by his tale (Sandoval even began making it into a song). Marie, however, found herself unconvinced, and eyed the young “lord” with considerable suspicion.

The next day dawned bright, and they were soon on their way again. A few hours out of Sandpoint, Sawyer began asking the caravan master what kinds of dangers they could expect to meet.

“Oh, once we get past Sandpoint, we could start to run into bandits, or orc bands, or the occasional werewolf up around Wolf’s Ear. But this first stretch to Sandpoint is a milk run – nothing ever happens along here.”

No sooner were the words out of his mouth, than a stream of sparks came rocketing from behind a boulder to their left, accompanied by a loud whistling sound. It narrowly missed the second wagon, and struck a large bush on the other side of the road, exploding into a burst of brightly colored sparks. As it did so, two goblins were thrown into the air from their hiding place behind the bush, accompanied by a chorus of “Ooo”s and “Ahhhh”s from all around the party.

Goblins began emerging from ambush all around the caravan. The horses of the narrowly-missed wagon were thoroughly spooked, and dashed off over the rough terrain, quickly upsetting the wagon. The driver was pinned beneath it, unconscious, while Marie, who was riding on board, was also tossed off, although she managed to avoid being stunned. As most of the goblins closed to attack on foot, one appeared riding an ugly, over-sized rat-like animal and firing wildly at the party with a bow. At the same time, someone could be heard singing an extremely rude song from behind the boulder where the rocket had come from.

Sandru rushed over to defend his helpless driver, while Sawyer hurried to guard Marie, urging Roderick/Nicki to stick close to him. Unfortunately, Roderick didn’t move fast enough, and found a goblin slashing at his legs and trying to climb up onto the wagon with him. Unable to cast a ranged spell with a goblin in his face, Roderick did the first thing that came to mind and kicked the goblin off the wagon seat. He fell right behind the horses, where his screaming and slashing panicked them. They dashed away, crushing the unlucky goblin beneath the wagon’s wheels, but carrying Roderick away from the fight in a runaway wagon.

Sandoval, Shinjiro, and Bella charged the boulder looking for the source of the mysterious (and annoying) singing, and found a goblin warchanter crouched behind it. He tried attacking with another (much smaller) firework, but finding himself surrounded, abandoned it and went for his sword. Outnumbered, he soon fell. Sandru made quick work of the goblin who’d gone after the driver, then drew his own bow to fire at the mounted goblin commando who was dashing around the party. Zhustin’s Sleep spell sent the goblin attacking Marie into slumber land, and she and Sawyer soon finished off another. Sawyer ran to intercept the commando, and as it rode by a mighty swing of his sword separated the rider from his mount – and the rider’s head from his body.

As the party began looting the bodies and caring for the injured, Sandru was cursing a blue streak. “What the hell?!? Goblins haven’t bothered anyone on this road in years! What the frak is going on? And where did they get those fireworks?!” After they managed to right the overturned wagon and stabilize its badly injured driver, the caravan limped on into Sandpoint.

Ameiko Kaijitsu

After getting the caravan squared away, Sandru led the party to an inn called the Rusty Dragon, and introduced them to its owner, an extremely beautiful Tian woman named Ameiko Kaijitsu. Ameiko was extremely interested in the fight with the goblins, and soon the party was the center of attention at the inn as they repeated their tale over and over.

Koya’s Curse

Eventually Sandru returned, along with Sheriff Belor Hemlock. He was also accompanied by a bent old woman, hunched over a walking stick and her head covered with a shawl. He introduced her: “This is my mother, Koya Mvashti.”

Koya hobbled over to the party’s table and pinched Sandoval on the cheek. “Sandoval Deszcu!” she cackled. “You look just like your mother, gods rest her soul.” She pressed her fingers to her lips and then to the sky, in the traditional Sczarni gesture of respect for the dead. “I’ve been expecting you. Your mother’s spirit came to me on the night she died, and told me she would be sending you to me. ‘Koya’, she said ‘you are like a sister to me, and you have suffered from this curse long enough. I have a son, Sandoval, a good man and a good son. I am sending him to you, so that he may lift your curse before you die.’ And now, here you are, just as she foretold!”

Koya Mvashti

Ameiko looked at Sandoval in amazement. “Is this him?” she asked. “Is this the man from your vision that you told us about?” She turned to Sandoval. “Oh thank you, sir, for helping an old woman like this. Everyone in Sandpoint loves Koya so much, and we want so badly for her curse to be lifted!”

Sandoval appeared to be thoroughly confused. He asked about the nature of the curse, to which Koya replied “It’s what your mother told you before she died. She said you had agreed to help me. Will you not help an old woman be free of this curse and have a few happy days before she dies?” Zhustin also tried asking about the curse, but Ameiko nudged him and whispered, “This is between Koya and the young Sczarni – it’s not your affair.” Thrilled to have been touched by the gorgeous Ameiko, Zhustin was left speechless for the first time.

Finally Sandoval agreed that he would help Koya lift her curse, and she clapped her hands with delight. “Oh gods be praised! Quick – someone go fetch Father Zantus. We will perform the ceremony right now, and begin lifting the curse this very night!”

When asked ‘What ceremony?’ she cackled wickedly. “Why the wedding ceremony, of course. I have buried three husbands, but have been cursed with a barren womb. Sandru is my adopted son, but I have never had babies of my own (though not for lack of trying!). But now dear Sandoval has come to lift my curse, and bless me with many children in my old age. He looks very virile to me – why I’ll bet that I’m pregnant before the sun comes up on our wedding bed!”

As Sandoval sputtered and tried to talk his way out of his “betrothal”, Sandru, Ameiko, and the other patrons of the Rusty Dragon erupted in roars of laughter. Koya threw off her shawl and stood up straight, revealing that she’s not nearly as old as she appeared to be. She rapped Sandoval smartly across the back of his head with her cane. “Never try to con a con, kid.”

The confused party eventually pieced together the story: Sandoval had conned Sandru into giving him free passage in the caravan by pretending to be a long-lost relative of Koya’s bearing a message to her from Sandoval’s recently deceased mother. When Koya heard the tale she immediately saw through the con, and decided to turn the tables on the silver-tongued bard.

Goblin Hunters

When the excitement died down, Sheriff Hemlock listened as the party described the goblin attack (and with many repeated tellings, their actions had by now become heroic in the extreme). He shook his head. “We haven’t had any trouble with the Licktoads in years and years, but a couple of weeks ago they somehow got their hands on a load of fireworks, and it’s made them way too brave for their own good. Yours is the third caravan they’ve attacked, along with some smaller groups of travelers. So far no one’s been killed, thank goodness, but that luck won’t hold. We’ve had to reinstate our old goblin bounty – the town will pay 10 gold for every relatively fresh pair of goblin ears, and we’ll give 300 for the head of their leader, Chief Gutwad. You all seem like a pretty capable group – we’d appreciate it if you’d see if you can locate their village in the Brinestump Marsh and clean them out for us. You might want to hurry, though – another group of adventurers left a few days ago intent on wiping out the Licktoad threat and collecting the bounty for themselves.”

After some hemming and hawing, and after being reassured by Sandru that the caravan would be in Sandpoint for at least 10 more days collecting more cargo, the party finally agreed to go after the Goblins. The Sheriff was pleased, and gave them the following advice about Brinestump Marsh:

“Brinestump isn’t as large as the Mushfens farther to the south, but the swamp is dense and tangled. It’s easy to get lost in the place. No one’s made a really detailed map of Brinestump — there’s been no need, since there’s not much of value there. But if anyone knows his way around in the marsh, it’d be that eccentric old halfling, Walthus Proudstump. He calls himself the “warden” of the swamp. A fishing trail leads from the Lost Coast Road directly to Walthus’s shack in the swamp. You could do a lot worse than following that trail to seek out the halfling’s advice.”

As the night went on, Bella went upstairs to take a much-needed bath, while Marie went to the Sandpoint Cathedral to seek advice from Father Zantus. Sandoval set out an empty cap and began singing, and was soon joined by Ameiko, who proved to be quite talented. Zhustin was amazed that he would have both a real bed to sleep in and apparently unlimited free beers from the grateful patrons of the Rusty Dragon. As the night wore on, the party began overhearing (or having locals enthusiastically force them to listen to) all manner of gossip and rumors. Some of the more memorable ones:

·   “Some travelers coming from up coast say they saw a dragon—a big black one—flying around above central Mosswood. Hope they were drunk or something. We don’t need no dragons ‘round here again!” (This immediately prompted the by now quite drunk Zhustin to decide “To hell with goblins – let’s go get us a dragon!”)

·     “The Soggy River Monster was seen again, this time by a fisherman on the New Fish Trail. He said it stood taller than a man, had white skin, and had a mouth that opened up all the way down its neck. It was eating what looked like a goblin on the far side of the river, which is why the fisherman managed to escape.”

·      “That weird halfling who lives at the end of the New Fish Trail raises snakes as pets. I kid you not! He coddles them like my niece coddles her pet rabbit, Mr. Nibbles! Takes a special kind of weirdo to keep snakes as pets!”

·     “If you is headed into that swamp, best watch out for Old Megus, the swamp witch. I heard she used witch magic to turn into some sort of swamp zombie and now she’s stalking Brinestump looking for people to eat!”

The party agreed to sell what they could of the goblins’ gear and use the proceeds to buy a few supplies before heading down to Brinestump Marsh the next day. Would they find the Licktoads – or would the Licktoads find them?

The party gained 211 XP for their exploits, with 2000 XP required for level 2. We’ll meet at Leo’s again next week.