Food for Thought

Bella was still peppering Teikono with questions as the others dragged her out of the inner vault, hoping the Imperial Dragon guardian would give them some loophole they could exploit to get at the other Imperial Seals. “Wait a minute – I just thought of something else!” she exclaimed as they were climbing the stairs, but Sawyer blocked her path back down. Sighing, she resigned herself to moving on, still confident she could have found a way around the dragon’s vow if she had just had a little more time.

Back on the first floor, they crept out of the secret door, being careful not to do something to cause the clockwork golems guarding the front door to mark them as a threat. They knew there were stairs up to the second floor right across from them, but to climb them, they’d have to pass the tapestry that the shadow tigers had attacked from, and no one was keen on going through that again. Instead then retreated back into the series of galleries along the western edge of the palace. At their southern end was a stout wooden door, looking very much like the doors to the other guardrooms they’d passed through. Sure enough, when Bella pressed her Gloves of Reconnaissance against the wooden door, she could see a small square guardroom, and a pair of bored Typhoon Guards.

The guards were shocked to see the door flung open and find nearly a dozen foes (when you counted Nicki’s bony friends) facing them. Zhustin immediately Dimension Stepped behind the guards and assumed a defensive (fetal) position, distracting them enough for Bella’s sword to find a vital organ. Sawyer lunged from the doorway, and Shinjiro charged through, pummeling a hapless guard as Sandoval launched into his dazzling display, leaving them both shaking with fear. The Typhoon Guards tried to defend themselves; one scratched Bella’s arm with a lucky blow, and the other tried to retreat, slashing at the cowering Zhustin with his katana. The wizard waved his staff blindly around, trying to deflect the sword blows, but Bella and Sawyer came to his aid. Suishen exploded in a brilliant flash of flame as it sliced through one of the guards, and Bella left the other so weakened with blood loss he could barely stand. Shinjiro planted his feet, lashed out in both directions with his fists, and the two guards collapsed to the floor.

The quick battle hadn’t attracted any attention that they could tell. Bella quickly climbed the stairs, and found that the tower room above this one was empty. There was a closed door in the eastern wall, and a ladder leading up. The ladder led through a trapdoor to another guardroom; other than the arrow slits dotting its walls, there was no exit.

Returning to the group, Bella donned her gloves again. As everyone expected, the door opened back into the dining hall they’d seen before. The room was still bustling with activity, as servants hurried between a trio of charcoal ovens on the far side of the room, bringing food to a grossly fat oni seated at one of the room’s tables. More Typhoon Guards were scattered around the room, scowling at the harried servants.

They knew they needed to go up yet another level to reach the throne room, but there weren’t any obvious stairs they could see, at least not from Bella’s limited view scrying through the door. They could go back down and take their chances with more tigers, or try to fight their way through this room.

“Who says we have to fight?” Sandoval asked, and all heads turned. “Let’s just stroll out and act like we belong here. There’s no reason for invaders to be coming out of this door – maybe they’ll just ignore us.”

Without waiting for debate, Sandoval turned to the door to put his plan into action. Zhustin rolled his eyes and cast a quick Haste spell, expecting things to go south quickly. Sure enough, Sandoval had barely gotten out of the door when he all but collided with a burly Typhoon Guard standing just outside. “Hey! Who are you and what are you doing here?” the guard demanded. Unfortunately, the bard had yet to learn any Tian beyond ‘Another drink please’ and ‘You’re cute – what’s your name?’. He responded to the guard’s challenge with a jaunty tip of his hat, and continued on his way. The guard, dumbfounded by this puny human refusing to kowtow, pursued Sandoval, struggling to draw his swords from their scabbards. Sandoval kept walking, ignoring the guard’s demands that he stop. The Typhoon Guard finally got his wits about him, and decided to teach this insolent fool a lesson, and his katana got Sandoval’s attention as it slashed across his back. He turned, and an arrow sank into his shoulder; their little altercation had drawn the attention of the other guards in the room, who were rushing to their comrade’s aid.

One of the guards rushed Sawyer, joining his fellow in pinning the bard against a closed door. Two more were running to join them, but abruptly changed course when they saw the guardroom full of strangers. They missed Sawyer, who was standing in the open doorway, but effectively bottled up the only exit out of the room. The other guards stood back with their bows, firing arrows through the gaps in the combat. Their oni master grunted with approval at their actions, but kept stuffing food into his mouth.

The guards thought they had the room blocked, but they couldn’t stop what they couldn’t see. Bella, who’d swallowed a Potion of Invisibility as soon as Sandoval left, slipped past them, and backstabbed one of the guards chasing Sandoval. Zhustin also cast Greater Invisibility on himself and managed to dodge through the doorway. He ducked between a pair of tables just in time to see the oni commander, Bogo-Na, gather up a large bowl of noodles and a haunch of meat and disappear. Marie Teleported out of the room, and smacked one of the guards in the back with her adamantine mace.

Suddenly the Typhoon Guards in the doorway seemed to have as many enemies behind them as they thought they had “trapped” in the room. Shinjiro stepped up and unleashed a Flurry of Blows that left one guard reeling. Nicki, who was content to stay in the relative safety of the guardroom while this harebrained plan played itself out, took a deep breath, then puffed out a dart from his blowgun. The tiny dart did no physical damage when it struck the Typhoon Guard’s neck, but the Black Lotus Extract coating it left him woozy and weak.

Sandoval, pressed on all sides, began singing as he whirled his echoblade desperately about, blood spraying with each swing. But the Typhoon Guards surrounding him were taking their toll. Each wielded a katana in one hand and wakizashi in the other, and they were skilled with both blades, and the growing pool of blood on the floor was coming mostly from Sandoval. He realized too late that the Typhoon Guards were a little tougher foes when they weren't surprised and outnumbered 4 to 1.

One of the guards drew back his pair of swords and prepared to deliver a coup de grace on the wounded bard, but suddenly another pair of swords came jutting out of his chest. As he collapsed to the ground, Bella whipped his blood off her blades. “You’re welcome!” she grinned. Marie saw Sandoval fading, and Teleported behind him, then hit him with a Cure Critical Wounds. Sawyer gutted one Typhoon Guard, then beheaded the other, and suddenly the doorway to the guardroom was open.

As Sawyer moved out into the dining hall, he felt a sudden inexplicable (well, greater than normal) urge to attack Bella, but the feeling passed. Shinjiro rushed past him to engage one of the bowmen who had been firing arrows to little effect. He hit him once, but the guard dropped his bow and whipped out his katana and wakizashi. The katana sliced Shinjiro’s leg to the bone, and the wakizashi opened a gash across his abdomen.

Sandoval used his Jaunt Boots to leap away from the one guard still attacking him. He glanced at the ovens across the room, and had an idea. “Everyone look away from the ovens!” he shouted in Common, then cast Pyrotechnics on the burning coals. In an instant, the room was filled with a brilliant display of fireworks. When the sparks died out, one of the Typhoon Guard bowman was left futilely rubbing his eyes, trying to see through the pulsing afterimage. Nicki, not knowing what other dangerous spells might go off outside, pulled the door to the guardroom shut, “To protect Ameiko,” he told himself as he listened to the muffled sounds of battle outside.

Sawyer closed with the last Typhoon Guard who’d been chasing Sandoval, but even as he sliced him up, he was keeping one eye peeled for their gluttonous commander. Not seeing him, he activated Suishen’s Invisibility Purge. He heard a stream of curses from behind the closed door as Nicki once again found his invisibility negated, but then he saw the corpulent commander floating near the ceiling, stuffing noodles into his maw. “He’s up there!” he shouted, as Bella finished off the guard.

Zhustin spotted him immediately. He’d been waiting for the oni to reappear, and immediately summoned three huge Air Elementals who surrounded the oni. Bogo-Na reluctantly dropped the remains of his meal, and cast a Cone of Cold that blasted half the party. Marie rushed to Shinjiro’s aid, whacking the guard with her adamantine mace. Shinjiro followed up with a wicked Flurry of Blows despite his wounds. Another of the bowmen dropped his bow and rushed to join that fight, hitting Shinjiro even as his friend redirected his attacks against Marie, inflicting grievous wounds with his flashing swords. Ignoring the new attacker, Shinjiro stayed focused on the guard attacking Marie. He delivered a spin-kick, and heard the gratifying snap of a neck breaking, and the guard collapsed.

Now that he could see the oni commander, Sawyer activated Suishen’s Air Walk and charged, but Bogo-Na’s naginata deflected his attack. Zhustin tried casting Enervation on the oni, but his spell resistance thwarted the spell. Bella drew her bow and, aided by the Haste sent a stream of arrows flashing towards the big oni. They all seemed to strike the exact same spot, until it looked like a single, many-feathered shaft protruding from his massive gut.

Bogo-Na was surrounded. He looked longingly at the windows in the far wall, contemplating escape, but he saw no way to get there without being torn to pieces by his enemies. Resigned to his fate, he resolved not to die without exacting as much pain as possible. He twirled his naginata two-handed, and slammed it into Sawyer with the hatred of centuries behind the blow. Sawyer’s armor and ribs both cracked as the blow fell. Before Bogo-Na could follow through, a volley of Magic Missiles slammed into him; Nicki had finally emerged from hiding. Gasping for breath, Sawyer directed Suishen’s full oni-hatred against the commander. His rolls of fat were no substitute for armor, and his entrails began to spill out. As he looked down at his wounds, Sawyer brought the sword down on the back of his neck, and his head bounced off the floor below.

Their commander dead, the last two Typhoon Guards didn’t last long. Sandoval fired an arrow through the unseeing eye of the blinded guard, while Marie and Shinjiro finished off the other. As Marie doled out healing, Ameiko hurried to reassure the frightened servants who had taken cover behind the ovens during the battle. “Is there a way up from here?” she asked in Minkaian, and one of the cooks nodded. He pointed to a door in the north. “That way, Princess,” he whispered. “The stairs to the throne room are through there. But the way is guarded.”

The PCs earned 17,829 XP for the night, putting them at 603,891 XP, with 635,000 required for level 15. We won’t meet again for the next three weeks; I’ll be in Australia, then Rich & Joette will be coming back from the bluegrass festival. We’ll decide where to meet when the time gets closer. In the meantime, Scott will be sending out character sheets for his dungeon, starting when the Jade Regent wraps up.